Category Archives: Messages
Why why should I ever be kind to anyone? Why does it matter? Not only do these small acts of kindness wither into nothing but fading memories, many times they are so insignificant to the that person. I still want to be kind, I want to be helpful, I want to be appreciated, I want to be liked. This is why even though time and time again I wear my heart out on my sleeve it becomes crushed and stamped down into nothing. Help, someone help. I want to help because I want to be helped. I want to be recused from the sinking inevitability of a lonely future. Good acts aren’t lasting even if people say they are. The only thing that I have ever found lasting is the memories of my strongest emotions. Standing at the top of those snow covered mountains with with three friends is the most complete Ive felt in ages. This weekend I felt like I wasn’t alone. Thanks so much for just being a good friend, you and everyone else. I know when I get all emotional on people it creeps them out, but just so you know just having good friends makes me feel very grateful.
I am happy to accept this award and thank Eric Alagan at “Written Words Never Die” <http://ericalaganfanclub.wordpress.com/> for this nomination it means a lot to me.
Below are the conditions upon which I am to accept this award.
Thank the Person Who Nominated You
Post Seven Unique Things About Yourself
Nominate Fifteen Other Bloggers
Seven Things About Me
- I am a senior in high school in State College, Pennsylvania
- I plan on studying engineering or medicine in college with a minor in English
- I am a face-off man for the school lacrosse team
- I am a confirmed Catholic
- I wait tables at Texas Roadhouse
- I write all of my tasks for the next day on a whiteboard that’s mounted in my room
- I am an avid guitar and harmonica player
My Fifteen Nominations
I want to be with somebody who can see my soul. I want them to be as imperfect as I am, so we can share out flaws and faults, and enjoy the goodness in each other too. I want to let my guard down and just be. When they are lost in thought I want to be able to know want to to know what they are thinking about, and have some interest in it. On a Saturday night, I want to know beyond a doubt that they are going to be there, that I’m not going to be alone. I don’t want to be critiqued and judged, just loved and appreciated. I want someone like you.
Somtimes I feel numb, like nothing in the world could bring excitement to me. Sometimes I feel like I am literally itching to get out of my skin and run somewhere. It feels like at these moments I constantly need to be in motion, and it’s true, progress seems to be the only thing that differentiates the present from the past.
Sometimes I don’t think before I act. This is an easy way to make some pretty regretable mistakes. Believe me, I know; this is coming from experience. Acting on whims is only satisfaction for the moment and has no real value in the long-run. Every once in awhile it turns out that mistakes can be truly helpful in the long run, but understand even the most self-less acts bear some personal strife upon them.
Sometimes I think that I am smarter than I am. A smug arrogance that I have bred out of the gaining of greatly doctrined knowledge sneaks into my persona. I believe myself, at times, to be superior, but this is a subconscious flaw and I loathe it. Sometimes my pride is smashed to pieces when others outshine me. Often, this proves to be a good thing.
Sometimes I want to cry. For all my reasoning and well thought out words , I can’t answer the greatest questions in my life. Sometimes I hate myself for falling, for making others cry. Too often have the tears I’ve caused become satusfying to me. It is obvious that selfhis desires can turn us all into monsters.
Sometimes I feel comfortable living as I am; pleased to forget but not willing to forgive . Every arrogance of my past is a sin and I believe that I am scared to change my ways. I even argue that change isn’t possible, but this is all folly. To accept change in stride is to truly grow, yet still forgiveness is a must. I’m sorry.
It’s been a roller coaster of a week; fright, anxiety, excitement, wonder, and even a little compassion have all been wrapped up around each other like a ball of yarn and it’s only Wednesday. For the past week, I’ve been going through the post holiday anxiety, you know, facing a long winter with next to no breaks in sight until summer. It happens every year, you can’t help but to slip into worrying about the future, how you’re living your life, and all the things you wish to change about yourself. This year I also have to decide which college I would like to attend, and make choices that will affect the rest of my life. Its inevitable that throughout this process you start to feel isolated in your own head, and mental isolation leads to a feeling of physical isolation too. I have found myself in a much more mellow mood doing a lot of thinking on my own, questioning theories I have come up with over the past year, and reconsidering what is important. By this evening I had done several full cycles through all of my emotions and upon arriving at work, I was leaning towards hopeless. Light has a funny way of creeping up when it is most missed though and my two favorite colleagues were on shift tonight, and I ended the night feeling more genuinely close to these two girls than I have with anyone in a long time. We shared dinner after the Texas Roadhouse closed and we talked for nearly an hour and half about all of our lives, the ambitions and the failings. These two people are probably considered to be just out of my “age range” for friends, but at the end of the night I was feeling more confident and hopeful about my future than I have in a long time. It just goes to show that even the most unlikely people can become the closest of friends, even the most worthless of days can hold an indefinite measure of meaning. There is a lot of uncertainty on the road ahead for you all and for me, but one thing is for certain and that is that no matter where you are there in life there will always be a friend looking to reach out, you just have to know where to look. This January, I look forward to seeing my friends Jess and Amelia at work and hopefully in other aspects of my life too.
So tomorrow marks the end of another year. It is probably one of the most exciting days of the year fills with family, friends, and partying. It is followed by New Years day, quite possibly the worst day of the year, filled with anxiety, fear, and stress. For many the joy and anticipation of the holiday season is but a memory as millions return home to work and school. The Christmas lights that were once looked upon with wonder and gladness now serve only to damper your already soured spirits. The holiday season is the greatest time of the year for a reason, and it is undoubtedly deserving such a title, but how can a month filled dreary weather, term papers, and deadlines ever match up to the magic of December? Well the answer is simple enough. “Suck the marrow out of life”, everyone says it, but to avoid the post holiday depression you need to stay active. Get back into your routine as quickly as possible. Spend time with people you like to see. Don’t stop having fun because you feel as though you’ve over indulged. Happy New Year’s eve everyone! Don’t let it get the best of you like every other year. This one can be different.
When the stars refuse to shine and the world seems to be nothing but darkness and despair, know that the world does not break everyone completely; we do become stronger in the spots where darkness weighs down the heaviest. Know that you are not alone, know that “all you need is love is a lie, but remember that all those you love are there for you…
I woke up this morning to my grandmother wishing the house “Happy Easter” and a stomach ache from all of the greasy food that I ate last night. So while everyone was fussing over all the breakfast food (which was put in the oven an hour before they decided to serve lunch) I went for a run. Needed to clear the mind and body a bit. When I got back I was entertained by the families talk of constipation and other various problems that holiday foods give you. Then my sister discovered my twitter page. So for the past half hour I was the target of countless jokes, but in the end I couldn’t help but smile and laugh along. It is Christmas after all. Enjoy your family this Christmas day.
Merry Christmas Everyone! The best to all who are close to you this season… This blog is my present to myself this year. I hope you all enjoy!
I believe in magic; I always have. It was J.K Rowling who was first able to capture not only my attention but also my entire imagination.
Through her words, I quickly found myself immersed in a world where broomsticks were not a tool for cleaning but essential equipment for the most popular sport; motion pictures were not movies, they were quite literally pictures which moved, and magic was simply a part of life. Harry’s world was my world, and I found myself trying to show everyone how great it was. It was Rowling’s words that made magic a tangible factor in my life.
I am now 18 years old, I play guitar, harmonica, and write. I am about to graduate high school, and I now what to pursue a dream. It was through writing that magic came to my life, and I want to bring that same magic into other people’s lives. This is a space where I will post various sorts of writing and you are welcome to do the same. Give me some feedback, post your stuff, or just chat about really cool writing. Explore your inner writer and who knows, you may find a little serendipity along the way